The truth is, there is no writing happening lately, unless it’s for school or a work email. I just don’t have the brainpower. I have been feeling COMPLETELY overwhelmed with work/school/life and everything I want to accomplish…
Until I realized that wanting to do too much actually results in me doing nothing. Not with any degree of proficiency, anyway.
So…for now, I’m limiting myself to blogging/book reviews, work, school, and Holly Lisle’sFind Your Writing Voice and How to Find Your Writing Discipline workshops. (Yes, I’m aware of the irony.)
I just need to let some things go for a bit before I lose my grip on everything.
My goal for this month was to finish up the first draft of The Fall. The story is completely outlined–using my favorite, a phase outline–everything is fresh in my mind, I still like the story…but for the past few weeks, forcing myself to sit down and write has been kind of like pulling teeth.
Today, I figured out why: the story that’s outlined, that I’ve been writing, is no longer the story I want to tell.
Don’t get me wrong, I still want to tell this story. But the story is no longer about what I thought it was about. So, I have all these little glimpses and glimmers of the other story in my head, but I don’t have my trail mapped out. I’m close to finishing the current draft, but there’s really no point, since I no longer want to tell the story.
So, I’m going to stop writing this story. Give myself a break for the rest of the month to deal with the huge, looming reports due at work. Continue outlining the Witches rewrite, but stop all of my other writing efforts as I focus on the job and school for a couple of weeks.
And bump The Fall to a bit later on my list of writing projects.
With the first calendar week of NaNo over, I thought I I’d give a brief update: I’ve written 10, 272 words so far. That’s more than I’ve written in a week in probably 5 years! I’m happy with my progress, and eager for more.
So…I’ve decided to do NaNo next month for the first time since 2012.
Yes, I have a full-time job with long, crazy hours. Yes, I go to school, too. Yes, I have a 5k to train for in 2 weeks, a 10k in 5 weeks, and a half-marathon in February. Yes, I have 2 blogs to maintain and I write book reviews for My Trending Stories.
What’s your point?
I participated in—and won—NaNo 5 years in a row, from 2007-2011. I started NaNo in 2012, but depression hit me hard, and I abandoned it (along with practically everything else). I found that barely-started story (about 35 pages of it) last year and did not even remember writing it. (But I was pretty impressed!)
When I had mostly conquered my depression (May 2013), I wanted to get back to my normal life. Then I had a stroke on June 1st. I spent the next 6 months in a haze of exhaustion, recovery, and adaptation as I came to terms with my new normal after almost dying.
I didn’t write a thing for over a year.
Slowly, I’ve gotten back into writing, but I miss the adrenaline-fueled rush of NaNo, so I’m giving it a shot next week.
Guess which story I’m going to finish? Yep. The one I started during my last NaNo.